Saturday, April 23, 2005
cough cough cough ..... coughing like crazy... argh. my throst is so itchy tt i cant stop coughing...argh. hab veen sick for so long le...when can i finally get well?? argh.
a sad day for me....sad sad. tired..and realli tired...
the word "trust". i trust ppl easily...some may say i gullible..but once you lose it...i'll not trust you again...never ever! u may do things to try to let me trust u sgain..even if i want to i will be reluctant to...sometimes, you may not mean it..i dun want to use the b-word, but i cant find another word to say it...a slip? not tt i noe tt anyone has just done tt to me nw...but juz the tot of that scares me....i'm frighten u see...
i look at the ppl ard me...wad some of them do realli shock me...and i have trusted them w some stuffs..nw, i'm not so sure if i can trust them again after witnessing this...
A and B are close frens..or mayb i shld use the word seems to be nw...den instead if standing up for tt person or at the very least keep quiet abt the matter...the A talk bad abt the B too...wad the...i was shocked. horrified. i started wondering if i can trust them w anything at all if all they turn out to be are juz 2-faced hypocrites. realli freaked. i'm unwilling to trust anyone nw...mayb juz one or two exceptions..ppl whom i trust alot and rely on...so if dey ever lose my trust..i duno wad i'll do..the entire world wld juz fall apart for me..i doubt that day will cum...and i hope it nv will..i trust them....
its realli damn scary to think of the complicated world we live in...where you will nv noe wad the others are realli thinking...dey could appear to be nice to you and everything..but deep dw inside u will nv noe wad dey think..a world where u cnt differentiate the reals from the fakes...i wana live simply...in a simple world where everything else in just simple...where i am able to trust the ppl ard me..i really want to...issit possible for me to do tt w/o getting myself hurt? i'm afraid of being hurt again...
++jingz++;
4/23/2005 10:59:00 PM
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
argh...was posting juz nw when the thing gave up on me..argh..hav to retype...argh..shld say wad i wan in summary nw cos realli tired la....
hmmz ya..realised i forgot to put up the sesames street family photo..hahaz..here's it:
aniwae..yes issac..i noe the screen v small den the photo too large...i was juz experimenting w the photo thing..cos nb use b4...argh...pls pardon me..argh...i noe i noe...argh...noe my blog v ugly k...thou shall change it when i finally hab the time..whch is not anytime soon...and ya, peeps, if u wana tag..you wld have to click on the middle button in order to do so..got prob ar..argh.think the internet got sth against me..argh...wadeva!
anw..got quite a no. of ppl join choir today...not used to the no. sigh. fri still got audtion!?!?! oh no....sigh. my voice still v unsouding...argh...so nan ting la~ cant sing properly! argh..throat still quite pain...coughing like crazy...argh.
aniwae, b4 choir prac and my pe lesson..went to ikea to eat w yang hong, issac, zhen and hana..."rushed" back for my "pe" lesson..for which i cant do..take timings for them for their nafa...sigh...on the way there..zhen was grinnig like crazy cos he finally got his i-pod..lol. so farny la...but den when he realised tt it wasnt in such a gd condition as he expected...he started regretting it...so farny la~ haha. okiez..shant tease him anymore...haha
anw, faker, i duno u noe anot..and i dun care...so even if u noe..u dun nid to "gloat" abt it...like telling me tt u noe..sharnt be bothered w you..
it seems like this is really not a gd yr...so many ppl sad and al...so many probs...argh. wad the....WHY??? tell me why..its a crucial yr for me and many of my frens and so many things are happening..i wldnt be grumbling if they are gd things...but they are not..much draeded in fact...just today alone, i see several of my frens sad...all troubled w stuffs and probs...it brings me down too...cos other ppl's mood can affect me easily...sigh. no..shant let things pull us down..things will get better! and we muz all strive on! gd grades for "a"s and gold for syf for choir! hoping....and striving hard!
and alex...hope eveything turns out fine k...i noe it will be! *nod nod*
++jingz++;
4/20/2005 12:15:00 AM
Saturday, April 16, 2005
the saints chorales...after our concert..
oh no...i've lost my voice..damn sexy man..haha..but...i cant sing! argh. gd thing the concert's over...and i wld say that it's a success! we all worked hard! and our efforts paid off...although there were alot of wrongs...the audience din noe anything... was quite disappointing but im happy w it...haha. minshan, peck wuan and jian wen came!! so happy to see them..
after the concert..me, yang hong, pearly, hana, wai sze, sarah, chong ming, carynl, alex, zhen, olivia, joyce and mr liew went to ps to celebrate..haha..had bk..and mr liew treated us ice-cream...haha. got some left cs got ppl too full to be able to eat it..haha,,den we played "zhong ji mi ma" and the loser wld hab to eat 5 spoons of the ice-cream..haha. so farny..and all the way thr..sarah was trying to inbutton ppl's shirt..haha..so farny..and tt alex ar..tried to unbutton hers too la..wad the..he's a guy le..for gdness sake! it all started at the cathedral when sarah asked me to ask nicent, zhen if i'm sexy...the!! haha and i asked her if its a dare...haha..den it juz started...sarah was to tell mathias he's handsome and wai sze to tell alex "i love you" haha...so farny...
here's some photos taken..but pardon me if it turns out weird...experimenting...
dont the guys look smart in their ties??
before setting off to the cathedral:
me and lih miin (ah miin)
ah cheng, ah qi, ah miin
alex tryin to catch some slp in the reading rm..haha
shh...yang hong slpin..haha
hey..dun take that! lol, but take le anyway..haha..
me and shamane..at the cathedral..
min shan, peck wuan, jianwen and me..frens forver!
thx for the flower, peck wuan..and i realli appreciate u guys cuimng and being so supportive! (",)
++jingz++;
4/16/2005 10:30:00 PM
Friday, April 15, 2005
hahaz...i'm using the com in school at the moment....ltr will be the concert le....hope everything will be gd! gambate!! woo-hoo! yeah! issac staying...realli v happy abt that... hahaz. anyone one who witnessed hana's and my reaction ytd wld hab tot tt we were lunatics.hahaz..lynn wld be one...hahaz. anw...thx alot lynn...for the shes..realli appreciate it alot...and i believe u wont tell anyone wad i told u ytd rite...
wah~ today the lessons ar...sigh...realli duno why cum sch..onli got physics tut...den m.e .... wah~ oh..not forgetting the "consultation" i mean lesson w mr jiwen...not realli productive cos i din finsh my work..and got alot of wrongs la~ sigh. my chinese realli damn lousy... jiwen's like a walking open dictionary la~ he explains the words like a dictionary..i mean as if he memorised from it la~i noe he din...wah~ super la..while mere mortals like me can onli fumble w words to search for the rite ones to explain....sigh. realli lousy le~ and the exam is onli abt a month away..wondering how i gg to do well....sigh.
ooh ya..i have my cast removed le! but still nid to wear a splint for support...ytd remove de..the fracture is still thr...and is still healing..in other words..not yet healed..sigh. when they remove the cast..my hand juz feel so numb and stiff la..and painful too..hmph. the doc actually ask if i want to recast anot...but i rejected the offer...haha..so troublesome la..the cast! restrict movement and heavy and cnt wash!!! haha. anw..my hand still rather weak..sigh. cnt move my wrist yet...and cnt bend my thumb backwards...pain pain...sigh sigh...
oh no...my voice v sexy nw..haha...from sore throat and all the coughing..sigh....how i gg to sing ltr!?!?!?!?! argh. ooh...pearly calling...gg to the reading rm to find her nw....gambatte!!
++jingz++;
4/15/2005 11:46:00 AM
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
i have decided to be magnanimous.. to forgive jonathan and wilson. no point getting myself hurt and angered by them. have been angry long enuff le~ waste my energy only...shant be anymore..although i get a kick out of it by gossiping abt u guys... better dun "step on my toes" again. being magnanimous = being kind and generous to (to ppl u have defeated) - according to the dic...better dun take it as a sign tt u can bully me.....
anw...counting down 2 days to the soncert..and think we still sound quite bad...sigh. i juz cried juz nw..cos v sad...issac might be quiting..and from his response juz nw..it seems almost confirmed...sigh. realli v v sad..will miss him terribly..although only knew him like for a few mths..have grown to be quite close to him..easy to tok to..and can be so comical tt u can juz luff at him..sigh. will miss him terribly....
oh no...he juz got so angry tt his fever rose to 40.8 . damn worried abt him nw....sigh.
++jingz++;
4/13/2005 10:07:00 PM
Saturday, April 09, 2005
anti-jonathan. anti-wilson. no more anti-frank.
actually feel bad abt anti-ing frank...but 'he' is juz weird la...
jonathan and wilson..nw i dun like using the j-w approach to find the national income equilibrium le la~anw, i cant realli do econs anw...failed my BT v badly....sigh.
realli tired....concert at cathedral cuming up....syf too....got prac almost everday(well, is evryday except for sunday)..realli tired ar..put in so much effort..heart n soul into it..hope we will give a realli well performances...and dey cnt say choir suck anymore....will do my bez though i may not be gd...hold on there gal! wahahaz..seems like i always nid to self-encourage..hahaz. gambate everyone!
++jingz++;
4/09/2005 10:33:00 PM
